Saturday, April 19, 2014

15 Years

15 years.

That's how long I've been a mom.

I spent much of today getting ready for tomorrow's big celebration. And wiping my tears. I just can't believe that my oldest child is about to be 15.

15 is big.

We're talking driver's license big.

As in she won't need me anymore.

Ok, that's not entirely true -- she'll need money, laundry washed, and food.

I pray she'll also need me for a shoulder to cry on, a sympathetic ear to listen, and a celebratory high five or an everything-is-going-to-be-ok hug.

I dug out Lexi's baby book today, because she asked me what time she was born and I had no idea. I found the answer -- 5:54 p.m. -- and then I got sucked into reading all the details I'd written. I smiled when I read the list of people who gave her gifts (co-workers at the time, who are still some of my best friends 15 years later, even though we are no longer co-workers). I cringed when I saw the picture of my nine-month-pregnant-belly. And I teared up at the pictures of sweet baby Lexi with my grandparents, all three of whom have since passed away.

I spent a little more time looking at pictures from the past 15 years. I am so amazed at how fast the years have gone. My little bald headed baby has grown into a beautiful young lady. I am so crazy proud of her, and I can't wait to see what the next 15 years hold. I just pray they don't go as fast as these first 15 years did.

When I think about all the things I want to tell my first born child, I simply can not find the words (which is a first for me!). But I did find a song that pretty much sums it all up.  Here are my favorite lines from "Find Your Wings" by Mark Harris:

I want you to know
As I watch you grow
I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings 

Happy birthday to my sweet Lexi. 
Remember -- I'm here for you whatever this life brings.
It's good to be your mom.

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