Alone Time

So my life.

Usually I'm ok with it - I haven't peed in peace in almost 13 years.

But today, it really bothered me.

Obviously, it wasn't just the being followed into the bathroom (that's right - today I didn't even get to shut the door. They were on my tail the entire day) that got to me, but it was the straw that broke the camel's back.

I'm grumpy, bitchy, overwhelmed, tired, depressed, and stressed.

I'll get over it. I always do.

But right now, I'd like to run away.

Motherhood is amazing - the best job ever. But it's not all roses. Kids are needy. They want attention, food, clean laundry.. the list goes on. Most days I love it, but today... I'm tempted to just tell them to wear dirty underwear and take the day off.

And you know it's bad, when even the kids realize they only need to talk to you when you are in the bathroom.


My conversation with Jake, seconds after I sat down to pee:
Jake: "Mom?"
Mom: "I'm in the bathroom and not accepting questions right now."


You'll never believe what he needed.


This was the follow up conversation:
Me: "Sorry I yelled. I just really had to pee. What did you need?"
Jake: "Yeah, sorry. I know we only want to talk to you when you're using the bathroom. Sorry about that. But I just wanted to tell you that I went to the bathroom and remembered what kind of cereal I just ate - you know, the kind that makes my pee smell funny."


Sugar smacks, in case you're wondering.


But really?


Why on earth would he feel the need to tell me that in the first place, much less when I'm busy?


I know I should treasure these moments because very soon they will all be grown and the house will be empty. 


Blah, blah, blah.


I can't think that far ahead.


Right now I'm more concerned with timing my trips to the bathroom for those rare times I might get a whole two minutes to myself.....